It's been a week, I know. But I've been progressively busy this week. I should be anyway. Started off the week with my new class. 09S4. Not bad. I miss being in Year2. I shall not elaborate further about this. Just know, I'm doing fine.
Watched a play yesterday at Jubilee Hall with Ham&Fad thanks to Nab. Interesting. Then Nab had another show and Ham had ugama class, it was me and Fad. While waiting for Nab, we ended up watching Confessions of a Shopaholic. Haha. In the end, Fad went home. I went home and went out with my family again to masayu where I ended up meeting Nab there. Hah.
Staying home today. Haven't done that in a while. SYF's coming! 8th April 2009.
Don't forget to remember me.
xoxo 1:08 PM
Sunday, March 22, 2009
Not dead, not gone.
It was a confusing and worrying Saturday night, I must admit. Thanks for explaining though. Yes, I was worried sick, I had every temptation to text you that night but I told myself I couldn't, not until you did. I guess I was 60% prepared for what you were going to say. I must say, preparation comes in handy. I'm sorry, but I've to tell you this. He may with all his might take you away from me, but he can never stop me from loving you. Never. ' But why bring it up again? It's all over for now, ain't it? :) I still love you.
New class tomorrow! :)
xoxo 1:53 PM
Tuesday, March 17, 2009
And then we all tried to understand one another. Oh well.
xoxo 2:43 PM
Sunday, March 15, 2009
Yield not because you want to.
Change. Everything is beginning to change whether anyone likes it or not. The economy's downturn, the world temperature constantly rising, the everything that may or may not affect everyone. I'd take it as something that we all have to adapt to. But really, is saying we have to adapt as easy as adapting itself? Think about the emotional rollercoaster you'd have to go through. But then again, is it really necessary?
Every minute of every day now, I keep telling myself. Stop thinking with your heart. It's not gonna do you any good. I stop myself from all the unnecessary tears. But somehow, all that, just makes me uncomfortable. It's just not me. But it's a change. Something I have to adjust myself and my feelings and my mind to. Maybe one day, I'll finally say to myself. 'Hey, this is working pretty well. I shall keep up this work.' Because I believe that right now, this is essential. I need to start focusing. I cannot procrastinate anymore. Time is not on my side, or anyone else's for that matter.
I went through what you call the 'probation period'. It gave me more than what I bargained for. And not in a good way. I guess no one really knows how I felt at that period. All the stress was really, in fact, killing me. I couldn't help but to keep on crying while trying to pace myself with studies. I know that everyone else was going through stress just as much as I am, but not many are going through my situation. Or what was my situation. I must admit, that I was too emotional. I don't know if it really was me, myself and I to be blamed for not being able to control my emotions or something that hinders my control. But none of that helped me for sure.
This time, I will think more with my mind and manage my time well. I can do this. Yes, this whole retention situation has affected me, my self-esteem and everything else. And other people too. Yes, I have thought of the fact that I disappointed my loved ones. It hasn't been easy for me. It's hard not to let it affect me. It has.
Whatever it is, I'm hoping and praying the best for this upcoming term. I'll restart my year fresh. I'll be more than what anyone expects me to be. I cannot risk disappointing anyone anymore. I love my family and Adli very much and I can't do this to them anymore. Not now, not ever. It's a setback, alright. I'll move forward now.
Yeah, now.
xoxo 1:04 PM
Saturday, March 14, 2009
It's NOT the end, it's just the beginning.
Today was the day my status was confirmed. I asked my Mr. and he said he couldn't help me anymore. I had to keep the calm look. After our conversation, everything just sank in. I guess these past few days I was just in denial. I knew it was gonna happen but I refuse to let myself feel it. Finally, I felt it. I cried, in front of my fellow dancers. I gained my composure back a few minutes later. I blamed myself for not putting enough effort last year. I blamed my teacher for not being lenient in marking. Then I came to realise that I couldn't just sit there and start blaming. I should do something about it.
I am going to make the best out of it. Retaining may not necessarily be a bad thing. I could possibly do better cos I get to brush up on my foundation. It's time I take control of my life, my academic life I mean. I will be the top student for PU1 2009, just you wait.
xoxo 5:20 PM
Tuesday, March 10, 2009
The birthday girl and her cake :) Junny & Cathyyylove. Fred Perry and Cathy :) All my love! For you, Cathy :) (ignore Amir's cigg box & the lighter...was a nice picture) Walk through this bright pathway. awwwww. <3 candles done by the boys. hahaha. KFC first, surprise her later. muka aku cool.
Cathy's ever so surprising 18.
Finally! My girls have joined me in the 18 world :) Aly turned 18 on 1st March and now Cathy on the 8th! Hahaha. Well, we didn't really plan a surprise. Super impromptu. I made up a story that ADli broke up with me and wanted to meet her at this Seletar Hills park near her house. Hahaha! Luckily she was at home. Hahaha although recuperating from an unfortunate accident. I was I guess, 'selfish' BUT for a good cause :) It was really nice until .... someone had to spoil the surprise. Hahahahahahaha. Well. I hope we can get to do more surprises like this again. Pretty fun y'know! :)
Love you Cathy!
xoxo 7:59 PM
Sunday, March 08, 2009
This is what I trained one whole week for. Hahaha.
xoxo 11:16 PM
Saturday, March 07, 2009
You're My Saving Grace.
There's only 2 types of people in the world; ones that entertain, and ones that observe. I think you entertain because I enjo observing what you can do. You're getting more and more absurd by the minute. And to think you're growing older. My dear girl, we may be younger than you but I believe you've got a lot to learn just like many of us. Shit happens, you just can't handle it. But thanks to you, I've learnt not to be like you.
And my dear bestfriend, forget about her. She's a sore loser. End.
xoxo 5:56 PM
Sports Fiesta 2009
It has been a great experience being in the Sapphire Cheerleading team. I love you guys! Although, we didn't win, we are all champions in Missy's heart :) I know I haven't updated in a long while. Haha, been busy practising for yesterday. The whole week I had cheerleading. And I couldn't go home like always with Adli :( I got really tired.
Sapphire cheerleaders & rugby boys&Crystal really helped me a lot when I passed out on Thursday and Friday. Haha. I swear I don't like the feeling. Now, I'm thinking, thank God I stayed in school yesterday. What if I passed out in the MRT alone or something like that? I mean, not that I was thinking of going home without Adli(which I did, in the end) but yeahhh. Then who would help ME? :(
Note to self: NEVER use mind over body to keep yourself energised.
G-double O-D-J-O-B Good Job! Good Job! (clapclap) G-double O-D-J-O-B Good Job! Good Job! (clapclap)
The birthday girl and her cake :)
Junny & Cathyyylove.
Fred Perry and Cathy :)
All my love!
For you, Cathy :) (ignore Amir's cigg box & the lighter...was a nice picture)
Walk through this bright pathway.
awwwww. <3
candles done by the boys. hahaha.
KFC first, surprise her later.
muka aku cool.
Sports Fiesta 2009